英語小達(dá)人每天10分鐘 428 Correct Male Responses
男人正確的回答
What makes these questions so bad is that everyone is guaranteed to explode into a majorargument and/or divorce if the man does not answerproperly.
這些問題之所以說它們不好是因?yàn)槊恳粋€(gè)問題如果男人回答得不正確都會(huì)導(dǎo)致一場(chǎng)吵架甚至是離婚。
Question 1: "Do you love me?"
問題一：“你愛我嗎?”
The correct answer to the question is, "Yes." or if you want to be more elaborate, you mayanswer, "Yes, dear." Wrong answers include:
正確的回答是：“愛。”如果你還想多說些，也可以說：“是的，親愛的，我愛你。”錯(cuò)誤的回答包括以下幾種：
A. I suppose so.
A. 我想是的。
B. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
B. 我說是你是不是會(huì)感覺好些?
C. That depends on what you mean by "love."
C. 那得看你說的“愛”是什么意思。
D. Does it matter?
D. 這很重要嗎?
E. Who, me?
E. 誰，問我嗎?
Question 2: "Do I look fat?"
問題二：“我看起來胖嗎?”
The correct male response to this question is to confidentl and emphatically state, "No, ofcourse not!" and then quickly leave the room. Incorrect answers include:
正確的回答方式是確定無疑地說：“不，你一點(diǎn)兒也不胖!”然后迅速離開房間。錯(cuò)誤的回答包括以下幾種：
A. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
A. 你這不叫胖，可也確實(shí)不太瘦。
B. Compared to what?
B. 和誰比?
C. A little extra weight looks good on you.
C. 你胖點(diǎn)兒好看。
D. I've seen fatter.
D. 我看是胖了些。
E. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about your insurance policy.
E. 你再說一遍好嗎?我剛剛在想你的保險(xiǎn)條款。
Question 3: "Do you think she's prettier than me?"
問題三：“你覺得她長(zhǎng)得比我好看嗎?”
The "she" in the question could be an ex-girlfriend, a passer-by you were staring at or anactress in a movie you just saw. In any case, the correct response is, "No, you are muchprettier." or simply "Of course not!" Wrong answers include:
這個(gè)問題中的“她”可能是你的前任女友或是你盯著看的一個(gè)過路人或是你們正在看的電影里的女演員。不管是誰，正確的回答是：“不，你要漂亮得多。”或者“當(dāng)然沒你漂亮!”錯(cuò)誤的回答包括以下幾種：
A. Not prettier, just pretty in a different way.
A. 并不比你漂亮，只是不同種類的漂亮。
B. Not prettier, but definitely thinner.
B. 不比你漂亮，只是更苗條些。
C. Yes, but I bet you have a better personality.
C. 是的，但是我相信你的性格比她好。
D. Not as pretty as you when you were her age.
D. 你在她這個(gè)年齡時(shí)你一定比她漂亮。
Question 4: "What would you do if I died?"
問題四：“我死了以后你會(huì)怎么辦?”
A definite no-win question. No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hourof follow-up questions. This might be the stupidest question of the lot, as is illustrated bythe following stupid exchange:
這絕對(duì)是個(gè)沒法回答的問題。不管你怎么回答，都要準(zhǔn)備好回答至少一小時(shí)的后續(xù)問題。這是最愚蠢的問題，正如下面的對(duì)話展現(xiàn)的：
Woman: Dear, what would you do if I died?
女人：親愛的，我死了以后你會(huì)怎么辦?
Man: Why, dear, I would be extremely upset. Why do you ask such a question?
男人：親愛的，我會(huì)非常傷心。你怎么會(huì)問這樣的問題?
Woman: Would you get married again?
女人：你會(huì)再結(jié)婚嗎?
Man: No, of course not, dear.
男人：當(dāng)然不會(huì)，親愛的。
Woman: Don't you like being married?
女人：你不喜歡婚姻嗎?
Man: Of course I do, dear.
男人：當(dāng)然不是，親愛的。
Woman: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
女人：那你為什么不想再結(jié)婚?
Man: Alright, I'd remarry.
男人：好吧，我會(huì)再婚。
Woman: You would? (looking vaguely hurt)
女人：你會(huì)?(看上去有些傷心)
Man: Yes.
男人：是的。
Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
女人：你會(huì)和她睡在我們的床上嗎?
Man: Well yes, I suppose I would. Where else would we sleep?
男人：是的，我想會(huì)的，不然我們睡哪兒?
Woman: And would you take down the pictures of me and replace them with pictures of her? (icily)
女人：那么你會(huì)把我的照片都取下來換成她的嗎?(冷冷地)
Man: Yes. I think that would be the correct thing to do.
男人：是的，我想應(yīng)該這樣吧。
Woman: Is that so? (leaping to her feet) And I suppose you'd let her play with my golf clubs,too.
女人：是嗎?(在跳腳兒了)我想你還會(huì)讓她用我的高爾夫球桿吧。
Man: Of course not, dear. She's left-handed...
男人：當(dāng)然不，親愛的，她是左撇子……
Question 5: What are you thinking about?
問題五：“你在想什么?”
The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was justreflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, andhow lucky I am to have met you." Wrong answers include:
正確的回答當(dāng)然是：“親愛的，如果我顯得心事重重，我只是在想你是一個(gè)熱情、完美、細(xì)致而聰明的女人，我能和你在一起實(shí)在是很幸運(yùn)。”錯(cuò)誤的回答包括以下幾種：
A. Baseball.
A. 棒球。
B. Football.
B. 足球。
C. How fat you are.
C. 你太胖了。
D. How much prettier she is than you.
D. 她比你漂亮多少。
E. How I would spend the insurance moeny if you died.
E. 你死了以后我怎么花那筆保險(xiǎn)費(fèi)。
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